Tranforming the Past and Opening to New Energies

Running in parallel to the surge of spiritual energies coursing through my body that at times are peaceful and inspiring and at other times painful and violent, the last two years have proven to be filled with moments of hope and excitement surrounded by great challenges and upheaval. My girlfriend got quite sick right around the time she moved into my tiny studio apartment in Longmont Colorado. We were in and out of the hospital multiple times within the next few months. A mis-diagnosis in the ER landed her a host of health insurance difficulties, including losing coverage for certain treatments, in spite of the fact that her physician wrote BCBS to clear up the matter. Then in September of 2007, her mom died unexpectedly before she could go into emergency heart surgery. My girlfriend and I had scheduled a vacation time to her home town in Monana which ended up being the very time we traveled there instead for the funeral, which the two of us arranged with some help from her brother who was temporarily back from the war in Iraq. She and I then moved to Montana, and since then have been making a living doing art and foster care for someone with developmental disabilities. The individual we took on, we found out later, was a pathological liar and ended up breaking, among other things, one of my car windows. It was difficult having him in the house, but we created a routine that made it manageable, and allowed all of us to do things we enjoyed. He lived with us for ten months, until his family, without warning, and for highly dubious reasons, pulled him from our home. After taking care of him for going on a year, he was literally taken out of our home a few hours after we received a phone call. This happened just over a week ago.

I believe that my meditative practice has served as an anchor during these chaotic times, and I believe that it will continue to do so in an uncertain future. This is a time of great transformation in our lives filled with peace and tumult. What we choose to do with our time right now will very directly shape our futures. Every choice we make has a consequence, even the unconscious and automatic ones that make up our daily routine. Though I would like for the shifts that our society and that each of us are going through to be peaceful, I believe there will be much apparent difficulty in the coming years as we are forced to confront the collective karma of denial, addictions, unhealthy attachments, and fear. It is my hope that we will emerge stronger, wiser, and more compassionate, as the result of what may very well be a function of a global kundalini transition.